insomnia
lack of light.. total blackness.. dark & deep velvety holes from which godly whores of every magnitude crawl.. hungry fires lick the bellys of our loved ones whilst all things rigid & structured fall to crumbling dust.. we are alone again in this abyss, unreasoned & unsane in our endeavors. forever used to mean a long long time.. longer than eternity, how our perception of its futility has changed during these times. how effortless may it be to dismantle and disassemble all things once held dear & close? in reference to potential energies, a tiny spark creates instant accelerated conflaguration and landslides are born from granular pebbles.
it was in the throes of makeshift tides we were lost so easily to the effects of onrushing forces, swept away in its narcotic ecstacy the delerium was made fast.. secure.. vaults of memories, of emotions & playback video recollection are carefully guarded, their contents invoked frequently as to keep fresh & vivid and close..
all things changed when our beloved exited this world 3 early summers ago, death released the power that keeps us bound by pact.. thrice the flames became twice, one fallen to demise and one lost in derision.. chemistry & cataclysm, movements within the universe, greed & hunger & undying lust are continuing to drive us forward along darkened twisted paths.. all bets are off now, this game is playing for keeps..
in love and in hatred, in oblivion and enlightment I lie sleeping with entropy, unraveling swiftly we are lost to the dark places and alone in the brilliantly shining blackness.. i fear no evil - i fear nothing embraced.. between us a strobing strength flows evenly, touching the voices and hearts of experiential addicts.. we stand alone within large gatherings. His ecplising moon casts a shadow of death over my house, no things are left standing but me... eternally awake with an intoxicating madness of awareness.
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-setia writing @ 2:45 PM
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
ashes
returning to these places, dark shadows move in intimate fashions and we swim mightly within a wonder-ness of the catastrophe in works currently & around us... inbetween the blades there comes safety, this want of violence & sensual interactivity.. we are arranged, as funeral flowers, between the corpses of these whose fortune included assimilation with us, at the times we began in these places it was sure that some would fall while others consume.. models in symetry & meta-sciences undoubtedly argue the rationale of sacrifice, of gluttony, of utter indulgence, of the abandonment of loved ones and loved things for services within the heart.. absolution, the last barriers of denial and being symptomatic of upcoming surrender, wafts its aura within these steel walls.. its ominence portays the toll of death in fine robes & beautiful faces.. we hear endtimes rushing towards these gates with considerable force, force capable of bursting open the film between here and there rendering our fabric of time null & void.. voices come as whispering sands under desert winds, suggestive & alluring, a consumate enigma feeding on the hopelessness of innocence..
better than us are those whose decay brings forth the meats of ingenuity, the passions of inspiration.. our intentions, to make great the greatlessness, to form shape to the shapelessness, continue in noncongruent eliptical patterns.. these pathways unaligned and without flatline host a congress of deviants in search of new & willing flesh suseptable to abuse & all manners of decadence.. blackness comes as singular dosages, meeting with hibition & will as acid to base.. fallout is explaining recent explosions, its dust and destruction flattering the very words we speak..
its the black beacons, the chaos, the passion & lust that keeps us in this place.. not as prisoners, but as faithful & addicted believers. movements of sludge, shallow beneath skin, invokes the surfaces of liquid in motion, we grasp in definition of this motion as its presence betrays.. turntable syrens invoke images of past wrong doings, of alters, flames and dark things and we feel glorrrrious..... everlasting becomes this sucking void.. imagination experienced as lucidity and all circumstances change with mitigating factors in valleys of rockbottomed bedsheets..
these moments of......
for love, for death, for all things unseen i bow & serve fervently.. time changes from this way to another, its entropic declining effects are felt everywhere.. in ways and in effect. we believe the course of this stream has interlaced other places with ours.. doorways appear out of nothing.. beings we refer to as 'ones' speak from great distance and barrier.. conditionally we barter, trading services for experiences.. reality-as-perceived submits to these changes and our illusion self prophesies itself into being and into other's perception. darkness calling us further away from consciousness.. it is calling us into the abyss.
alone and waiting for the future to unravel before us. waves, as repetive motions, overwhelm this place of existance; we may drown or we may swim with weighted stones.. knowing all that has occured before and is yet to happen is hell.. arriving in blessing's garments.. it is said that those who are truly sad are those who understand everything..
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-setia writing @ 10:06 PM
